My Tweets

Finally say Max Von Sydow and Christopher Plummer in the same room, and am finally convinced that they're not the same person. #Oscars — 5 years 46 weeks ago
Woo Hoo! Check out my new short story in the Night Terrors II anthology from @BloodBoundBooks: years 50 weeks ago
Got a bonus fork in the bag with my salad from Wendy's today! Oh yeah! Everything's coming up Hawkins! — 6 years 5 days ago
Some guy with a machete has been following me around all morning. Looks like I picked the wrong day to go to camp! — 6 years 5 days ago
Tee hee...Dixville Notch...<snicker!> — 6 years 1 week ago
Does anyone else think that Jonah Hill is a lot less funny now that they've started CGI-ing his head onto a thinner body? — 6 years 2 weeks ago
<Insert Team America reference here.> #KimJongIl — 6 years 4 weeks ago
Great moments in assholery: years 5 weeks ago
I can't get this song by Wild Flag out of my head. Anyone got an icepick? — 6 years 5 weeks ago
So, Blago's going to jail. I hope the prison barber knows what's coming. — 6 years 6 weeks ago